Accessing Energy Within

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What was trying to get my attention?  Who was trying to get my attention?

What is really ME?  The me I thought didn’t know any of this energy stuff.

I thought I was me, my body, but there was another me, watching all of this.  Who am I?

At this point I realized I was more than my physical body, because I was really the observor of my physical body.  As I began to explore this, I realized that the energy of me was flowing through my physical body.  I became aware of this energy when I would visualize my cancer cells destroyed by this beautiful white light.  I would lay quiet and still and imagine this light penetrating every cell, tissue, organ of my body.  My body felt alive, light and no kidding, I would be free of my pain.  I wanted to stay in this space forever, but obviously I had to move and live in this world.

Then a lot of thoughts would flood my mind and distract me.  I would go off in my mind thinking about my pain, or thinking about a upcoming surgery, or worrying about the fear my daughter expressed yesterday, and my connection to this energy was gone.  I felt heavy, worried and down right crappy!

So I started watching some of my thoughts.  Oh my God……all the time I spent spinning in these thoughts was crazy.  It was exhausting.  Then I would have more of the crazy exhausting thoughts and it felt impossible to get out of my mind.  But I was observing this too.  So I wasn’t these thoughts!!!  That was huge for me to realize.  I was really the one watching the thoughts.  I was not my mind!  Whewww!  But how do I get out of my mind?

I started to be so aware of this energy within me, I began moving it.  I could feel it move to different parts of my body.  I could feel it by a warm sensation and tingling.  I was so amazed.  I had become so disconnected from this energy, which was really me, that I wasn’t even aware of it for many many years.  It is always there, I just had covered it up so I couldn’t feel it anymore.  How do we cover it up and why do we????  It is a beautiful, peaceful loving place.

Could this be home…could this be me…..could this be God???


2 Responses to “Accessing Energy Within”

  1. Dennis Pyritz, RN Says:

    Great Blog! I have added you to my blogroll, “Cancer Blog Links” with almost 500 other cancer blogs at http://www.beingcancer.net, a cancer networking site featuring a cancer book club, guest blogs, cancer resources and more. Please stop by and visit. If you like the site, please consider adding Being Cancer to your blogroll.
    Take care, Dennis

  2. Sheila Says:

    Hi Dennis,
    thanks so much for connecting. I added you and your site.
    Would love to talk more over the phone.
    sheila

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